From Stuck to Aligned
Ever feel like you’re running on autopilot? Doing all the “right” things, ticking the boxes, but still wondering, “Is this it?”
You’re not alone.
Most of my clients come to me feeling some version of feeling stuck. They’re unsure of where life is going. They crave change but don’t know what change looks like. They want more… more meaning, more direction, more alignment, but they’ve lost sight of what their version of “more” even is!
I want you to know that stuck isn’t a dead end. It’s a signal. And with the right tools, it becomes the perfect starting point to build the new.
The Traditional Approach
Firstly, let’s throw out the old “5-year plan”! It’s a dated approach (yes, I’ve said it!) and for the vast majority it’s unsuccessful.
On paper the framework is great. You lay down the groundwork for the career and life you want then set concrete goals to help you get there. Therefore, it can be an effective way to take you from Point A to Point B.
However, in my personal experience as well as my coaching experience, there are significant gaps in the framework and how it’s utilised. Working with client’s that have previously used the 5-year plan, I’ve seen firsthand the disappointment and confusion when a year or so on they haven’t made much progress.
Why? It’s usually a combination of reasons; here’s the four top aspects that come up on repeat:
- The conversation is usually positioned around career, and maybe house and travel plans if you’re lucky. And don’t get me wrong, whilst those aspects of life are important, they are only several components of what life is about. My clients regularly tell me they measure success that incorporates health and wellbeing, family, relationships and more. They want a life that is balanced and provides harmony and excitement all at once! A life where they wake up enthusiastic in the morning about what the day could bring.
- 5-year plans are generally based on setting practical “SMART” goals to get us to where we want to be. Ever sat down with a coach or mentor and they’ve asked, “where do you want to be in 5-years”? Then you’ll go on to create a goal driven plan to get you there. For example, let’s say I’d like to be in a leadership position; I might build into my 5-year plan obtaining and working with a leadership mentor and achieving a leadership qualification… sounding familiar yet?!
- It doesn’t go deep enough and often misses core alignment. Goal setting is vital, absolutely, however if we don’t align those goals to the very core of who we are, then we are likely to experience feelings of failure and disappointment. Let’s take the leadership example; before anything else I should be clarifying my personal values, beliefs and behaviour set. Why do I want to be a leader? What kind of leader do I want to be? Who do I admire in this space and why? Does my mentor align with my aspirations as a leader? Does my current workplace culture and leader align with my values?
- Limited to no space for flexibility! 5-year life plans are often fairly rigid and don’t allow for the incorporation of new data and that includes your own development. If we focus a long-term plan around concrete goals alone, then what happens when life happens? When we change our minds? When our circumstances change? Rather, if we focus on what we want to feel like, how we want our mindset to be, the people we want to surround ourselves with, the values that are important to us, then our plan can flex with us as life does.
Introducing: The Life Blueprint
This is the work I love the most, supporting people to get radically honest about what’s working, what’s not, and what they truly want from this one wild and precious life.
The Life Blueprint is an exercise I developed to guide my clients through this process.
Think of it like creating a roadmap to your version of utopia; grounded, intentional, and totally bespoke.
It’s not about designing a fantasy life filled with yachts and champagne (unless that’s your vibe of course!).
It’s about clarifying and anchoring into the values, rhythms, relationships, and environments that make you feel fully alive.
This structured process helps even the most fixed mindset open up and explore what their dream world could look and feel like.
As the name suggests, it creates a clear blueprint that guides your decision making around everything from relationships to career, from health to personal development and everything in between.
Case Study: When “A Great Life” Isn’t Enough
Take one of my recent clients, on paper, her life looked ideal. She had a job she loved, a home she owned, a tight-knit circle of friends, and supportive family.
But emotionally? She felt lost. Confused. Deflated. Stuck in a cycle of low motivation and zero energy.
Some time ago she had ended a long-term relationship but was still financially and slightly emotionally entangled with her ex-partner; a tie that felt overwhelming to cut.
Her physical health was sidelined, her mindset was stuck, and her joy had gone quiet.
Through the Wellness Discovery process, it became clear that she wasn’t actually living her life, she was simply maintaining one.
We worked through The Life Blueprint over several sessions, weaving in other healing modalities to support her nervous system, mindset, physical wellbeing and emotional resilience.
Within a few months, she had:
- Refreshed her property and listed it for sale
- Released the pressure to emotionally support her ex-partner
- Improved her nutrition and physical wellbeing
- Picked up the confidence to start dating again
- And best of all, reconnected with her energy, confidence, and joy!
She’s now in a healthy new relationship and genuinely enjoying her life again! And it all started with one truth:
If you don’t know what your ideal life looks and feels like, how on earth are you going to make a plan to get there?!
What Would Your Blueprint Say?
Your utopia won’t look like mine, or hers and that’s the whole point. This isn’t about cookie-cutter goals. This is about your soul’s rhythm.
Take a breath and reflect:
- What does your ideal day feel like?
- What are you tolerating that’s quietly draining your energy?
- What would change if fear, guilt, or doubt weren’t holding the reins?
These are the kinds of prompting questions that guide the Life Blueprint… and guess what… they just might change everything!
Ready to Build Your Own Blueprint?
If you’re done spinning your wheels and ready to step into radical clarity, I’d love to support you.
📞 Book a free consultation here
📩 Or DM me on Instagram @theholisticlifecoach.nz
Let’s design a life that actually feels like yours, with clarity, purpose, and joy.
In wellness,